Breaking free from dieting and compulsive exercise

[cristinalatina]

After being a severely overweight teenager, I lost 50 pounds as an adult. I have since been paying a lot of attention to what I eat and try to make healthy choices, but recently realized how much out of tune I was with my real food preferences, preferred timing of meals, etc. as well as with exercise preferences, doing more cardio than I enjoyed, for example.

If you too are scared to eat or terrified by eating what you really want when you want it, I highly recommend the book that changed my perspective - "Intuitive Eating, a Revolutionary Program that Works" by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch.

Diets (unless for medical purposes)serve to disconnect us from true preferences and needs. I am still having a hard time remembering what I like to eat, but I am learning. Same goes with exercise, I do not enjoy high impact and too much cardio, nor do I need to exercise daily.

Anyone with a similar experience?

[Jane C]

Cristina,

I have alot of identification with your post. I'll note that VF guidelines do not allow discussion of diets, per se, and I'll try to respond consistent with the guidelines.

Its taken me many years of work - physical, psychological, spiritual, to come to terms with these issues - and there's been alot of one step forward, two steps back. I'm now in my fifties. My experience is you do have to work on all of those fronts. Its an inside job.

You wisely identify tuning into yourself as a key issue. Its so true. I think that's a very useful path, and worth even some temporary weight gain, because in the long run, its what works - both with food and fitness.

I support what you've expressed, and urge you to continue with this journey - there aren't any shortcuts. It is about self discovery, self love, and self care. You're doing great.

[alikruegs]

Christina,
As Jane said, the VF guidelines kind of squash the diet talk. But, I think your post is also relevant to exercise (re: compulsive exercise and overly intense exercise). Over the years here at VF, I have noticed a lot of people post that at one point they finally figured out what they liked and what felt good for their bodies. Other posters tend to worry about "fitting everything in" doing really advanced dvds, always having goals, keeping to a killer rotation, etc..
While I haven't squashed my obsessive tendencies completely, they tend to come and go. I like having rotations at times, but I think it's important to not feel intimidated by those who are advanced exercisers and those who seem to do it all. I other words, I think we can also learn to take an intuitive approach to exercise.... with one caveat: sometimes what you avoid (like in yoga), is what you need to do, so it can be a little more difficult to figure out what it is you want vs. need.

[Patti S.]

Hi Cristina:

Yes, quite similar to your situation in both exercise and nutrition. And the Intuitive Eating book has helped me (I have all of Evelyn's cookbooks as well).

I'm still working through my fears on eating and issues with emotional eating (30 years of emotional eating takes a little time to sort through).

The book, the Overfed Head is a terrific read as well but doesn't go into the emotional eating aspect as much.

Sorry if we're bending the rules here, WWWendy but this is relevant topic about compulsive exercise as well.

[mikkame77]

I was recommended this book recently and it is ringing true for me. I was compulsive on both sides and was not able to sustain this lifestyle for more than 3 years. Now, I've released the need for a "plan" and it feels great. I hope to find the balance that works for my body, spirit and mind.

mikkame77

[beth22]

Cristina,
I really enjoy your posts. You sound so much like me, too! I'm desperately trying to break free from compulsive exercise and beating up my body. It's only been a little over two weeks since I decided to make a change but I'm already feeling better emotionally and physically than I have in a long time.

It's amazing how doing workouts you WANT to do and make you happy to do can really change how you feel. I've decided to (try to) stop doing workouts that I dread and do more workouts that make me happy and are easier on my joints (and body in general.) If I think about doing a certain workout and all I can think about is how hard it is and/or how much I dread it, I'm now trying to just NOT do it and pick a different workout.

Life's to short to dread your workouts all the time. They should be fun, right? I've absolutely fallen in love with Kettlebells and Tracy Effinger. I'm also trying to incorporate more yoga and flexibility training into my routine. In the past I've always dismissed my yoga workouts thinking that they're a waste of time since I'm not jumping around, burning massive calories. But I'm trying to change my thought process and convince myself that working out doesn't always have to be about burning calories--it's about making your body strong and happy. These have really brought a whole new life and "fun factor" to my workouts.

Thanks for posting this!

[cristinalatina]

Wow, such great replies everyone!How good to know that others understand.

I had my younger sister visiting last week and was saddened. She has had a similar experience, and seeing her was a revelation, she was obsessing over every morsel, asking ¨How many calories in this" and "Is this fattening?" and moving the scale around the room each morning to get a lower reading.

It was a reflection of myself that saddened me so much. During my morning commute by bus, I grab a diet book to read to kill time. I know (and have tried) many diets, and love to read about them. But I was stunned when I started reading Intuitive Eating and started wondering what I really like to eat and had a hard time replying. I am at goal weight, but I keep wondering what will happen if I ever lose control - the thought is terrifying.

I have also taken two rest days in a row, including today. I was just too tired to work out. Even a stretch or yoga practice was not suitable. The day is not over and my conscience has coerced me into trying twice today to work out, to no avail. I just need to rest and relax.

Thanks again for the great replies, please keep them coming!

[Jane C]

Christina, you might want to take a look at restorative yoga -
http://www.yogajournal.com/basics/991

[Woodranda]

Hi Cristina, I can relate to this as well. I found while doing the P90X Lean rotation that my body does not need more than 2 days a week of cardio to lose weight. Before, that I tried to go along with the general consensus that one needs to do cardio several times a week to lose weight. Not true in my case and it was a relief because my preference is really weight work. Unfortunately, I still struggle with the eating part because shortly after I finished that rotation I had some set backs and have regained the weight. I feel confilicted about what I know I "should be eating" and what I am eating. I haven't found a healthy balance yet and will definitely look into getting the book you mentioned. Take care

[cherimac]

Cristiana,

Great post! I tend to be an all or nothing thinker too! And, I personally lost some enjoyment in life with too much focus on clean eating, exercising harder, etc. During the past couple of years I've been on this same journey too and it's becoming more and more freeing. Good for you finding it out while young, rather than waiting until you hit 40, as I did!!